Can I Be Honest?

When I started this blog, I really had no intention of anyone other than me reading it. I waffled between keeping it private and making it public and, even when I did go public, I was slow to get involved in the wide world of blogging. I started it (and the one prior to this one) as a way to document my newfound running journey, so in the beginning it was primarily running focused. Over time, as I got more comfortable with the idea of blogging publicly (even if only like 2 people read it), I started to branch out to more personal and lifestyle topics as well. Because I never meant for this to be a real blog, I've never had a clear direction. I've struggled to find my blog voice. Sometimes I find myself afraid to publish certain posts (like outfit posts, or product reviews) because well, isn't this kind of a fitness blog? And then I worry that there are too many fitness posts for someone who doesn't want to get pigeonholed into the "fitness blogger" niche. But then I feel too insecure to really call this a "lifestyle blog" because I'm really not that interesting. And now you know my internal monologue when clicking (or not clicking) the "Publish" button.

So, here we are. The lack of direction of this little blog of mine has been bothering me lately, and I've finally decided to do something about it. Starting with this new, clean slate of a design. I always love a fresh start and that's what I felt like I needed to get back on track. I'm not promising any earth-shattering content or anything more profound that what I've always posted. I'm just getting it out there, for the record, that this blog is about everything and nothing all at the same time. Hope you're cool with that.

Whether you're a new or old reader, allow me to (re)introduce myself:


I'm Tracy. I've never really liked my name; I was supposed to be an Erin but when I was born my dad inexplicably wanted me to be a Tracy. And so I am. I will not get into a bathtub until I have personally cleaned it myself. Whether I really like to run is still up for debate, but either way, I do a lot of it. Same goes for swimming, biking, and running (one right after the other). My persuasive skills must be pretty good, because I met my soulmate in college and not only convinced him to date me, but eventually to go so far as to marry me. I believe in good grammar and correct spelling. I need to be in bed by 10pm or I will be completely useless the next day. I have two college degrees and am working on a third. I still haven't figured out if that means I'm really smart or really dumb. I do not eat or wear animals. I'm pretty sure the cows in the field behind my apartment are going to turn me vegan sooner rather than later. I am really good at math. I like people who walk with purpose, because I do the same. My ability to retain narrative details is really bad. That means that even though I have binge watched Breaking Bad and know it's the greatest show ever made, I couldn't tell you more than the general plot. I strongly believe in obeying traffic laws, especially at 4-way stops. I blog because the world is big but somehow blogging makes it a little smaller.

So that's it. That's me. And all the things I've been afraid to be. I'm weird and a little insane. I try to keep it all together but really I have no idea what I'm doing with my life. I suspect it's going to be a little while longer before I figure it out. I hope you stick around while I work on it.

22 comments :

  1. Loved this and LOVE the new layout! It looks so good! I never really know what to call my blog either but I always try and remember that it is MY blog so who cares what others think about what I post - just do what you want! :)

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  2. I think its so great that you aren't sure of the direction your going to take your blog -that makes it more fun!! Too funny about Breaking Bad and not quite knowing what the plot is - I'm the same way and 3 seasons in LOL!! I love your last sentence - blogging does make the world a little bit smaller!

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  3. Great new design! I love the line: I like people who walk with a purpose, because I do the same." and I feel the same way about bathtubs :-)

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    1. I cannot deal with people who just amble!

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  4. The new layout looks fabulous, girl!

    I love reading your blog, and what's important is that YOU enjoy it--so take it in whatever direction you choose, girl.
    I love that you said that your blog is about everything and nothing at all. I feel that way, too.

    This weekend, my MIL asked me what I blog about and I was just blank. *Shoulder Shrug* "uhh... stuff?" Ha!

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  5. I'm a pretty new follower, but I LOVE your new design! I also struggle to push the "publish" button. I wonder if I'm being too personal or not enough; if I want to make that part of my self public for all to read about; if I'm even remotely interesting. There isn't really a theme to my posts. I think a lot of bloggers go through exactly what you are!

    Just hang in there and keep being you :)

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    1. Thanks so much, Paige! I totally get what you're saying - it's hard to find that balance between not sharing enough and sharing too much.

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  6. I have the same problem with narrative. We will watch a movie and a month later, my husband will recall things that happened in the story and all I remember is that it was a great movie and I may have cried. I also do not eat or buy animal products and went full out vegan 7 months ago, woohoo!

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  7. A few things: 1) I will come here to read whatever you write, whenever you write it. 2) I have the same struggle sometimes when it comes to what I want to post. As a "real writer," meaning it's my day-job and I've been pursuing literary work for oh, I dunno, forever, it's hard to find a balance between writing in my creative non-fiction voice which I love and posting content that the lifestyle blogosphere will enjoy. Not everyone wants to read an extended metaphor about my latest love-life disappointment... but not everyone wants to read about how I budget either! 3) I love the new design, it looks great! 4) That's so weird how you are about narrative details — I am the same way! And no one seems to understand that just because I say I've seen whatever movie you're referencing doesn't mean I am going to pick up when you're quoting it. That stuff just doesn't stick until I've read/watched something to the point of memorization.

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  8. Love the new layout!! I am the same with the narrative details, but I just never knew how to explain it lol. I can remember general plots of movies, tv shows and books but details escape me. I think I am the same with my blog, everything and nothing, and that's ok by me. I don't want to put myself in a box I can't get out of. I think weird + little insane is where it's at.

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  9. So, I really really like your layout. Your header is exactly what I am envisioning for my own new header, whenever I decide what I actually want it to look like/have time to design it. Also, I loved your little "about me" paragraph. I can relate to a lot of except, except maybe the vegan thing. Because meat.

    However, I can definitely be described as walking with a purpose, and I prefer it when others do as well. So there's that.

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  10. I turn the shower on with scalding hot water before I take a bath. I don't know if it really does anything but it makes me feel better when I know its been a couple days since truly cleaning it.

    I also always am back and forth between wanting my blog just to go private. For now I just pretend nobody in real life reads :)

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  11. I personally think you should blog about whatever you want to :) It's always a nice change of scenery when a blogger steps outside of their "theme" and posts something a little different.

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    1. I agree! I always like reading posts from other bloggers that are different from their normal content.

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  12. First I love the new layout! It's simple and I love the colors.

    When I started blogging I really had no clue what niche I would fall into it. I knew I didn't have enough time to become a "big" blogger and I didn't want to have that pressure to write 5+ posts a week. I don't enjoy writing THAT much. Within a few months I decided I was just going to write about whatever I want. Most posts fall into what I'm up to, running, wine, growing up thoughts because that's all that's going on in my world right now. I've thought about not blogging anymore but then I read old posts and I love seeing what's changed and the old memories. Including little ones that I may not remember off the top of my head. I don't really know how long I'll keep blogging but until I get totally sick of writing my life, I think I will continue :) I think the friendships I've gained through have really surprised me the most. Being really shy and only have a handful of close friends I didn't really think I'd make true friends through this. But I really really have and I'm so thankful for it! Thanks for being one of them too :)

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  13. I think with blogging we evolve into something we never originally thought.
    But, the great thing is that this is your space and your place, and you get to use you voice to discover who you are.

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  14. I'm glad this is the post I get to read about you for your re-introduction. I say just write whatever your heart desires! Some days I just write a whole long embarrassing story because it's on my mind and I life making people laugh. I don't really have any rhyme or reason either :)

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  15. LOVE the new look girl! Be true to you!!! I fell in love with you when I read you eat whole frozen pizzas back in the day. :) hahaha

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  16. Yep, you just described exactly how I feel about blogging. When I write, I think it is easy to be really open and honest about the things I like and dislike, but sharing?!? In real life I am a very private person, so posting something that seems so "me" for all the strangers on the internet to read is strange. I often struggle to push 'publish'.

    For the record, I'm excited to read your future posts no matter which direction you go in, and I love the new design!

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  17. LOVE the layout! I can relate to some of this on so many levels! I think it can be weird to fall in that in-between category of not quite falling into ONE category of blogging. I love when you blog about running and fitness things, but I love your other posts just as much.

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  18. I think most of us are clueless when we start our blogs- so sometimes a fresh change/update is needed! I originally thought I was starting a blog just to document our wedding planning/DIY type of stuff- that didn't happen at ALL lol!

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  19. This is a lovely "re-introduction"! I think we all get caught in the "where do I fit into the blogging world" cycle from time to time. I split up my fitness posts into a separate blog, which might seem like a hassle, but I enjoying having 2 different blogs with 2 different focuses. For the record, I like your blog no matter what you post! I'm glad I have found you lately through different link ups (I think that's where I found you? LOL Can't remember!) because you just seem like a great person!

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